Dogs and Dolls Don't Mix

Don't let the sweet, calm face on the left fool you. It was her that created the distorted, freaky face on the right. Can you imagine waking up in the morning to find your doll like this? Chloe is going to have doll issues for years to come.

My Big Boy

This is what my firstborn looks like just days shy of turning 9 years old. I'm still in shock that I'm old enough to have a 9 year old. I remember turning 9. It's so much fun though! I love our conversations, his sense of humor, his thought process, who he is maturing into and his sensitivity. This is such an awesome age. I'm so thankful for the opportunity to be his mom. God knew I needed him - he's taught me so much, ever since he was a baby.

Being the first, he's been my guinea pig, but he can even find the humor in that too. He's very patient with me and highly sensitive to my needs. He hates to see me sad and will do anything to help me feel happy again. He even finishes my sentences for me. I love watching his imagination and intelligence grow. I love how he consumes books and especially history (my favorite topic). He learns more than I can keep up with. Since he was a baby he has been highly driven. This made him very difficult as an infant - highly needy. But now I see why. He doesn't need pushing or prodding (only when it comes to cleaning his room). If he wants to know something, he finds out, he asks, he looks it up, he figures it out. I admire that in him. Thanks to his Daddy, he's becoming a huge computer whiz. He even teaches me things on the computer. He just can't get enough. Sometimes when I look at him now, I see this little baby and have to shake my head and refocus in order to see the big boy he is now.

He's taught me what the love of God feels like, he's shown me compassion when I didn't deserve it and forgiveness without hesitation. His love is unconditional. His trust in me is limitless. He thinks I'm the funniest person on earth and thankfully, he laughs at all my jokes. He treats me like a lady, thanks to his Daddy's beautiful example. I can barely remember life before him and I couldn't imagine my life without him. I'm a better person because I've had the chance to be his Mommy.

This morning, we had a rare cuddle time alone since Chloe and Bennett were still sleeping. He had alot on his mind to share with me. He says, "Mom, you know, I'm not a very good conversationalist." I told him that I understood perfectly because I'm not either. He went on to explain that he doesn't always know what to say to people. Ha! I know that is a gene I passed down. I encouraged him that if he was ever stuck about what to say to someone, just ask the person about themselves - people love to talk about themselves. I also told him that sometimes its okay to not talk and just sit and enjoy each other's company, just being together. Thank God for families and the only safe place to be yourself, whether that be when you feel quiet, silly, talkative or down.

Happy Birthday, Gavin. I love you as far away as Pluto is and back again!

Chloe Questions

Within the past two days, I have had to be quick on my feet when it comes to giving answers a bout life's questions. Chloe has been pondering alot lately. Here are her latest questions:

1. "Mom, a wong time ago, did vey use to use leafs to wite wiv?" It took a while to go through the data processing center inside my brain and pass through the 'translator', but 5 minutes later I was able to understand the basis of the question. "No honey, a long time ago people used to write with quills. They look a little like leaves though, don't they?" Then we had a nice, lengthy discussion on the history of quills, what they're made of, what you dip them in and why they didn't use to have pens.

2. "Mom, can my pink teacher in charge of her own felf, or is her mommy still in charge of her?" This one caught me off guard. You see, her 'Pink Teacher' is in her 50's, but her Mom, the original dance instructor who started the school (and is in her 70's) still sits in on all the classes. Chloe gave her a Christmas gift and the grandmother sent her a thank you note. This is the only thing I could think of that sparked the question. I loved her outlook on who controls whom. :) I assured her that once you reach your 50's you can control your own self. I'm starting to wonder if she thinks I have control issues....just a guess.

3. "Mom, why did God make eyebrows?" I have no clue. There is no answer for that question. I could guess that maybe it's to catch the sweat that falls off our forehead, but she wouldn't want to hear that. She is a 'real princess' and 'real princesses' don't sweat. This was a good time to divert to the old stand by, "Because God made you that way sweetie and God must like eyebrows."

There are many things in life I just don't know. It also just so happens, that it is those very things that my children desire to know. Odd. Thank God for the internet!

My Personality

This is a conversation that I just had with my eldest child. He was trying to compliment me, but I'm not so sure it comes across that way.

Gavin: "Mom. I really like your personality. It's very unique. One minute you're angry and the next minute you're happy. That's nice. I don't really know too many people like that."

Me: "What exactly is it that you like about my personality? The happy part or the angry part?"

Gavin: "I like it all."

Me: "So, are you telling me that I'm angry alot? Or do you think I'm happy more often than not?"

I do not think he was ready to analyze his statement to the depth I was wanting to go. So I let it drop. But inside I'm thinking to myself....mmm, lovely personality Cori!! Most people would refer to it as, Manic Depressive or PMS or crazy or hormonal. I've never heard anyone call it unique or even say they like it.

At least he tried. I'd rather hear that any day instead of, "What's your problem?" At least he made me laugh and helped swing my lovely personality pendulum to the other side - you know, the happy one.

New Year's Eve Insanity

Hello...my name is Cori and I'm insane! I let my husband talk me into crazy things...but the average person doesn't realize that it's crazy until they're in the middle of the 'activity'. I guess love really is blind, because I should have seen this one coming.

At dinner time on this, the last day of the year, my dear husband decides it's time he confess a story to the children that dates back to the bygone era of his childhood. The kids sit spellbound. They love stories of Daddy when he was a little boy. Surprisingly, in all our years of marriage, I'd never heard this story. That tells me he must have been saving it for some special occasion. Unbeknownst to me, tonight was the occasion.

Once upon a time, as the story goes, when Daddy was just a wee little lad of 10 years of age, his brother (two years younger) and him were left home with a babysitter one fateful New Year's Eve night as his Mom went to a party for grown-ups. Evidently, the sitter was "super cool" and let the boys stay up all night. When the clock struck twelve, do you know what the babysitter proposed they all do?

Before I tell you, it's important that the reader know the location of this blessed event was in Marshall, Minnesota. This is an extremely cold climate this time of year and snow is a frequent visitor. That being said, do you know what they still did?

They ran around their apartment complex solely in their underwear and socks. As the story goes, there was a foot of snow to traverse through, but that only seemed to energize their midnight trek.

In response to this delightful little story, the kids laughed and talked about how fun it would be to play in snow (with proper attire, of course). They asked if Daddy was cold and if his Mommy knew about it. That's when he proposed a new tradition for our little family. With the scene already set and the kids eager for excitement he non-chalantly suggests we go on a little midnight walk when the clock strikes twelve.

I couldn't say 'no' even if I wanted to. The momentum and excitement of Daddy's story left the kids thirsty for adventure of their own. I figured no one would even stay awake that long anyways, so I cast my vote in favor of the escapade, even though it already had enough votes to win without mine. I wasn't about to be the lone practical one.

Chloe and Bennett (who both took naps earlier in the day), are still wide-eyed at 11:45pm. Gavin is dozing off and Chuck and I are singing "Edelweiss" as we watch "The Sound of Music". We figured a 3 hour movie would help keep us all awake. So, 5 minutes before midnight, we all donned our bathrobes and slippers and braved the 40 degree weather as we dared to be the first people in the neighborhood to be at the park on the first day of the new year.

Thus is how this wonderful, new year began for us. I can't help but think we've just begun another crazy tradition. I'm also thinking our neighbors might find us a bit 'odd'. But there you have it, the insanity and excitement that has come to dominate our little corner of the globe. I could probably accurately hypothesize that absolutely no one else in the entire world was walking to the park at midnight on New Year's Eve as part of their celebratory process.

Kind Words

I'm under the notion that kids copy you more than they listen to what you tell them. Therefore, I am forever making my choices very cautiously. Many days I fail and they get an opportunity to practice forgiveness and grace with me. Then there are other days when I see the kindness, thoughtfulness, consideration and respect mirrored back at me (and sometimes toward each other). It warms my heart and helps remind me that all our (Chuck's and my) effort is not in vain (because many days it feels as though it is).

In our house, we're big on speaking kindly to one another since this is a simple, great way to show love. Chuck, ever the optimist, is the best at this. I've learned alot from him. I try to encourage the kids in things I catch them doing right instead of point out every little mistake. The hope here is, that maybe they'll show the same kindness to friends when I'm not around.

So, Chloe has finally caught on to our "psychology" and has begun asking me everyday, "Mommy, have I told you yet how boo-ti-ful you are today?" How can you have a bad day when it starts out like that?! Today she quantified it even more by including, "Mommy, do you know you are boo-ti-ful even when you are not a bride?" To her, the ultimate beauty is being a bride and yet here she was, bestowing upon me, the deepest compliment she could possibly find in her little world.

Kind words go a long way. Even though I've had to pick up two dog 'messes' in the house today, I'm not the slightest bit irritated because I feel 'boo-ti-ful'. My spirit is uplifted, there is peace in the house and the kids are encouraging each other (at least right now)...don't underestimate the power of kind words.

My New Job

Yesterday, Bennett had a major revelation and just couldn't wait to share it with me. With the most adorable look of excitement on his face he looks up at me and says, "Mom, I know what you can be when you grow up!", like he's been pondering my future career goals for a while now, "A librarian!" He ended it with one of those looks that seemed to say, "good idea, right?!" Then he added, "I just know you'll love it because you love books and you love to read." It was almost as if he just walked into a wall when the idea came to him - of course - it has to be that - those two things go together like peanut butter and jelly. He was so proud of himself.

But my question is, what's this whole 'when you grow up' part? Is he thinking that I act too immature and couldn't possibly be a real grown up yet? Or maybe he thinks I'm too young to have a 'real' job. Or maybe he meant when they all leave the house at some distant point in time, then I'll be a grown up (although he vows he will live with me forever). What age constitutes a grown up in a 6 year old's mind? Do I need to have white hair before I'm grown up?

I'm so glad he's looking out for me and carefully planning out my retirement from 24/7 mommyhood. I only have one stipulation - I'd definitely have to work in the children's section of the library!

A Blonde Moment

How could I ruin a perfectly good evening? Easy...by simply opening my mouth and then ever so carefully inserting my foot. I've become very good at that in recent years. Here's how it all began: We were out of town visiting friends this weekend when my friend's sister and brother-in-law stop over. We've met before and it had been several years since we last saw each other, so we enjoyed catching up. It took me a while to get warmed up, but then I let loose.

First it might be helpful if I explain a new term to you. Most of you might know what I mean by the term "fauxhawk", while others may blank out. It is actually a nifty, new, men's hairstyle. You can see it sported here by the ever stylish David Beckam:

This hair style is paramount to my mouth problem. Chuck was actually the one to bring me up to speed on such coolness. I was previously unaware that hair like this had a name. My friend's brother-in-law successfully wears this exact same hairstyle. And since I have zero social skills and don't know how to small talk very well, I decided to compliment him on his "cool hair". Except for I didn't say "cool hair" like I should have. Instead I said, "I really like your mofawk."

WHAT???? Did that just come out of my mouth? Everyone was kind of talking at the same time so I thought maybe my statement got drowned out in the sea of noise. If only I was so lucky. Instead of being drowned out, everything turned strangely quiet and then everyone looked at me. So, of course I had to say something, so I played blonde and said, "Did I just say mofawk? Ha. I meant to say, Fauxmawk, uh I mean, uh....Chuck, what did I mean to say?"

When will I ever learn? Sometimes its okay to just sit there and smile and nod every so often. I can do that. Things just seem to get too garbled up in the short trip from my brain to my mouth.

The poor guy took it all in good humor and did not act as though I had offended him or just called him a bad name. Next time I think I'll just write down what I have to say and pass it around on a sheet of paper - that way I HAVE to think before I talk.

It's funny though, I don't even have blonde hair.

Christmas Fun

Last night we thought we'd institute the "Dress Up for Dinner Night" rule again. The children couldn't have been happier. With all the creativity we could muster, we finally decided on a theme....Christmas. Highly original for this time of year...but actually, it doesn't really matter what theme we give to it, the kids will always come down in some crazy outfit that leaves you wondering whether or not they comprehend the English language. A visual aide might better enlighten the reader regarding our lack of creative flair.


You will see two of our offspring clad in bathrobes. Bennett, or, when in character prefers the name "Ernie", is your run of the mill elf (with underwear on his head) and your typical elf make-up. The one leaning against the wall is not pregnant, nor is he trying to impersonate Mary. He is in fact Santa. He said he couldn't find his bright red underwear, so he opted to don a green Santa hat instead. When asking Chloe what type of Christmasy get-up she was, all she could do was respond, "Pink Princess". I have a sneaking suspicion she might be a pink princess every time we do this.

You will have no trouble locating the snowflake in the bunch. I thought the doily on my head was the perfect touch. Notice the white make-up so deftly applied as to appear to look as if snowflakes have landed on my face? A true artistic flair. And then you have the leader of this motley crew - the ornament. He thought long and hard and came out of the closet with a hanger on his head. I had to encourage him to add a hat and gloves in order to make the ornament a slight bit more festive. And there you have it. Another lovely night in the Mallott household. But that was just the beginning. We ended our night of festivities with a fun game of Twister.

Chloe's Alter Ego

I was a bit unsure as to whether or not the boys ever got around to sharing the "Secret Code of Kid Rules" with Chloe. But I can now rest assured...they have. You know, the handbook all kids are issued (at some undetermined time, unknown to the parent - Santa probably brings it) that prescribe important methods and phraseology that all children need to know and follow in order to survive childhood in their predetermined homes.

I have never actually seen this so-called 'handbook' but I know it exists because all my children have followed it to a tee. Here are a few things they have all done and I know must be listed in the "Survival Guide":

1. When brushing your teeth, after applying a generous amount of toothpaste to the the brush (and sink area if at all possible), stick the brush under a faucet that is running at full blast long enough to get all the toothpaste off the toothbrush. This will create the appearance of brushed teeth, but will leave your breath unaltered from it's previous state. Your teeth will soon be falling out anyways...so don't waste too much time.

2. When helping your parents dust, always dust a circle in the middle of the furniture. Leave plenty of dust all around your clean circle to highlight the awesome job you did. This will garnish much praise.

3. When cleaning your room, shove as much stuff under your bed or in your closet. And never fold your clothes. Wad them up and try to shove as many as possible into the same drawer for quick and easy access. Try not to wash them too often either. Parents like efficiency, so keep the same underwear on as many days in a row as you can get away with.

My kids have let these few rules slip out over the years. I'm sure they're unaware that I have caught on. But it is this last rule that leaves me in awe of how powerful this handbook really is.

4. You must always have an alter-ego, a secret identity. At any point in the day, you should be ready to tell anyone (grown-ups included) what your super powers are, what your super-hero name is and what your logo looks like. If you can spell it all on your own - that will really impress them.

My oldest two have that one down to a science. There are numerous blog posts to prove it. But I've been wondering about Chloe. Was this only a gender specific rule? The answer is no. She, too, has an alter ego, I'm proud to inform you. It is "Sair-wuh" (Sara). For whatever reason she LOVES this name. This is who she is when she is a "mommy" or princess or impersonating any type of grown-up wearing high heels. She has to say this name in her high-pitched, airy, sing-songy voice. And when speaking with her, you too, must speak in a high-pitched, airy, sing-songy voice.

Sometimes I make the mistake of calling her Chloe when she abruptly chastises me and says, "My name is Sair-wuh". Oops. Even today, while we were working in her "workbook", under the name section she wrote it out as: FENII. As she was writing it she was sounding out Sara. Obviously we have some work to do on putting together proper letters and sounds...but she's trying, very adamantly, I might add.

Way to go Chloe...uh, I mean, Sara! I'm proud of you for sticking by the "Kids Handbook".

Bennett's Future Employment Options

So...we were doing our typical morning cuddle when we got on the conversation of what Bennett wanted to be when he grew up. He answers me with, "Well, I can tell you what I'm NOT going to be...a baker or a cooker. Cuz if I was that I'd eat all the cake I made and never give it to the people." Good point. What else is there? "And I definitely don't want to be a bowling teacher." Alrighty then, anything else? "I think I want to be a football player." I'm sure you'd make a great football player, honey. "But if the coach asked me to eat yogurt on the field, I'd have to say 'no'." You gotta put your foot down on certain issues, Bennett. I'm glad you realize that early on.

Cuddle time conversation never ceases to amaze me...it's filled with humor, creativity and randomness...wait a minute...so is my life!

Unconditional Love

In a rare lapse into seriousness today, Bennett gave me a glimpse of the magnitude of love he holds in his heart. He came to cuddle me this morning. I don't know how long he was laying there staring at me. I was able to pry open one eye and give him a knowing nod and half smile to acknowledge his presence. We lay there in silence for a bit until the most profound statement escapes his mouth, "If there ever was a beautiful woman, it was you, Mom".

My heart fluttered. I was able to open both my eyes to a squinting position in order to look at him. I asked him if he was joking. He said no. I asked him if he meant when I'm all dressed up and have my make up on and he said, "No, right now." And I said, "Like this, sick, with bed head, jammies on and my teeth not even brushed?" To which I got a huge grin and a YES.

I told him how much he just made my heart smile and how he already made my day and it hadn't even begun yet. God sure knows the exact moments to reach out and show you his unconditional love.

I'm sure he was just trying out lines for future use on whomever has the joy to become his wife. But that moment will stay in my heart forever. He sounds just like his Daddy. They must both have been issued the same rose colored lenses in which to view life and those around them.