The Human Booby Trap

The kids are upstairs playing 'cowboy'. They come down only to check on me and tell me all about the game they're playing. I hear Bennett yelling, "BOSS. BOSS."

Naively, I think they're talking about me. So I cordially yell back, "What Honey?"

"Not you Mom, Chloe. She's the Boss."

"Oh. Why?"

"Cuz we're playing Cowboys and we're fighting the British. And she's the boss."

Head nod. At a loss for words.

Bennett continues, "Mom, my whole body is a booby trap."

Ahhh. I see. How so?

"Do you want to know my powers? Well, my freckles are burning hot spots. My belly button turns into a machine gun. My eyelashes are tenticles. My hair is fire. Skin is water. My teeth turn into shooting missiles and my nose can smell like a dog. See, it's all a booby trap. Oh ya, and my toots and burps knock people out. And I'm not really smart."

That's when Chloe pips in with, "I'm the Boss cuz I don't do anything wrong. My job is to keep them gathered and not let them do anything crazy."

That's when Gavin informs me of his powers, "My name is Super Cowboy and my powers are: can go thru anything, my hat can make me fly, I have a sonic gun, I have a lasso that makes things weightless and I have a flying dragon named Bingo."

Okay. Can I go now?

All I'm sayin is, I wouldn't want to be 'the British' right now.

Gavin and Small Talk

It is summer. I spend every waking hour with my children - much to my delight. We do everything together. I take that back, sometimes they'll allow me a 5 minute window to read uninterrupted. But mostly, their little world's rotate around me constantly.

So, it was rather surprising when Gavin sat down to the dinner table last night like he just got home from a long day of work and asked me, "So, Mom, how was your day today?"

Um. Shall I go with sarcasm or pity him with his attempt at small talk (as I wish others would to for me in my ghastly attempts at small talk all too often)? I opt for the latter, "Well, Honey, I've had a fantastic day. How about you?"

"Oh. It's been good, Mom. Mom, I really like your cheek bones, how they go really high up like that and how it makes your cheeks kinda sunk in."

"Why thank you Honey."

"Mom. I also like your eyes."

"Aren't you sweet. Thanks so much" The other children are nodding in agreement with verbal ascents being thrown about cuz nobody wants to be one-upped in the 'lavish praises on mommy' department.

"And Mom. I like your eye brows and those bones up there."

"Well Honey, you are full on encouraging words tonight. Thank you so much. I don't know what to say." I can't wipe the smirk off my face and he continues staring at me all thru dinner.

It's so hard to believe that I'm the center of someone else's world. That the way I respond, the way I look at them, the sound of my voice, can all make or break their day.

The other night Chuck and I were going on a date and I came down in proper date attire. I actually did my hair (as opposed to the common pony tail or ever present clip), put on makeup and a dress. As soon as I walked down the stairs the kids descended upon me, Chloe patting my hair like a pony, Bennett rubbing my elbow and staring at me with stars in his eyes, Gavin bestowing praises upon me.

I'm awed with the gift of these little people in my life - I don't want to waste one valuable second with them. I love Gavin's awkwardness (at times). I love Bennett's flirtatiousness and flattery (yesterday he told me he'd be my servant for the day and said he didn't want me doing any work). I love Chloe's properness (be it in her speech or lady like mannerisms). How can I lavish love on them as much as they do me? I guess I can always start by admiring their cheek bones.