Apr 11, 2014

Teenage Speak

4/11/2014 — cori

I know it's been a while since I was a teenager.  I swore I would NEVER forget what it felt like.  And then I had 3 kids, got a little distracted from the whole teenage thing and yes, I eventually forgot.  But now, thanks to Gavin, we are fully immersed in teenagehood again.  And it's bringing back lots of memories.  Some things don't change over time:

The teenage eye roll (meaning, whatever)
The teenage head shake (meaning, you have no clue, do you mom)
The teenage shrug (meaning, I'm noncommittal about that mom)
The teenage grunt (meaning, yes, no, or i don't know)

Even though several things have remained constant, it seems that teenage verbiage is bound to change generation to generation.  It's just the way things are.  I remember actually making fun of how our parents used to talk as teenagers or any generation before us for that matter.  We were the definition of cool.  We were the bomb.  So it shouldn't come as any surprise to me that I'm being made fun of now.

In my day we were all Valley Girl speak, like, totally man.  Like, where'd you get those rad Z Cavaricci jeans?  Like, oh my gosh, they are way cool!

The word "like" still infiltrates much of today's teenspeak.  It is one of those 'cool' words no matter what the generation.  However, I was recently introduced to what is now considered 'hip', 'groovy', 'rad', whatever your 'cool' word is.  Here is a convo (short for conversation) Gavin and I had the other day:

Gavin walking over to the trash can:  "...that trash, though"

Me: "Are you saying something?"

Gavin, still at the trash can getting ready to empty it: "ya.....that trash though"

Me: "Um.  I don't know what that means."

Gavin: "Mom.  It means, the trash stinks."

Me: "Then say that.  In my world we say sentences that include both a subject and a predicate.  Are they not teaching that in schools these days?  I simply can't talk without one of those things in my narrative."

Gavin: condescending smirk and combined eye roll (meaning I just don't get it)

He even makes fun of me when I try to talk all teenagery.  I summon the voice of Crush from "Finding Nemo", you know, the calm, California cool turtle who's all like, "Dude...that's far out."  I'll start trying to talk like a cool teenager and I'll lower my voice and be like, "Dude...like, what's all that about?"  Which only serves to elicit more eye rolling and head shaking and condescending smirks. He finally broke down and told me, "Mom, whenever you try to talk like a teenager, you do it all wrong. Nobody talks like that.  Ever.  Don't do it.  It's just funny."

So, just for all you other non-teenager types out there who want the low down on how to talk cool, here's the key: less is more (and try to drop the predicate or subject from your sentence to really impress them).

....that blog though.

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