Outraged

I can't believe I had to learn this awful, sad truth from a table full of 2nd graders.  Nevertheless, that is how it happened.  I was told, are you sitting down, that Cookie Monster is no longer on Sesame Street.  What an outrage!  They informed me that they replaced him with Veggie Monster.  Seriously?  What kid is going to want to watch a monster that formerly ate cookies, suddenly change his tune and start eating veggies?  This is ridiculous!

I told the kids that we should boycott Sesame Street.  Come to find out, they're too old to be watching that kind of stuff...but they're still in the 'know' because of younger brothers and sisters.  I asked the kids "why?" thinking they had some inside scoop since they totally blind-sided me on this.  One child said, "Maybe they think he's being a bad influence on us and encouraging us to eat too many cookies?"  You think?  So, are they planning on retiring Oscar the Grouch because of his negative influence too?  Should we change his name to Optimistic Oscar?

Seriously, they are all MONSTERS.  Kids are scared of monsters.  Plus, as Gavin so aptly pointed out, "Who is going to teach us the letter of the day if there is no Cookie Monster?"  Excellent question.  The kids around the lunch table were all well aware of where I stood on this issue after our little discussion.  I sure hope they don't go home and ask their parents what 'boycott' means.

Update:  Thankfully, a friend who loves Cookie Monster as much as I do, actually took the time to dig deeper and find out if this sordid information handed to me by my 2nd grade informants is infact true.  Thank God she did.  After reviewing snopes.com, I have now learned the real truth that seemed to be lost on the children.  Cookie is not being replaced, he's just eating fewer cookies.  Whew!  He's trying to make healthier choices, which I can understand, given the whole child obesity problem.  

The Dog That Won't Bark and The Bird That Won't Chirp

Of course we ended up with the dog that won't bark and the bird that won't tweet.  It's our family and that is just par for the course.  Why would anything be normal in this house?

 The dog (Ninja)

The bird (Azul)

You will never find these two in the same picture together.  That is because when we "introduced" them, Ninja thought we bought the bird as a snack for her.  She instantly tried to seize the bird thus putting their relationship in a very tenuous situation.  

Since I have been the co-owner of The Bird, as I affectionally refer to it, for a week now, I feel as though I can speak with some authority.  Technically The Bird is Bennett's.  It sleeps in his room (in my house), in a cage (that I bought).  He does all the feeding, playing and cleaning of it.  In it's week of living with me, I have heard it tweet like 5 times only.  What's up with that?  It's a bird.  That's how they're supposed to communicate.

Then there's Ninja.  It would be better to describe her as a stuffed animal that just happens to be laying in the same room I'm in at all times.  She expects me to read her mind (which I can).  There are only two instances that would cause her to bark: 1. it is the weekend and she feels we are sleeping in too late and have forgotten about her 6am breakfast time or 2. she has sat at the back door for over an hour with out me sensing her need to go out.  At one of those two times, she'll let out one demanding bark.  Other than that, it's radio silence all the time.

What's next?  A fish that won't swim?