Apr 22, 2019

Ten Years Ago

4/22/2019 — cori

Funny thing about time, it stops for no one. This was me and my people 10 years ago. I could not begin to fathom what they or I would look like, do, be, enjoy, or where we would live ten years from this moment in time. All I knew was that I had my favorite people around me and enjoyed them to the fullest. I don't look back with regret and I didn't look forward with dread.

I was and still am excited about who my kids are becoming, where life is taking them, and what our relationships look like now. The one constant I've learned over my years of learning how to be a mom is that as soon as you think you know what you're doing, everything changes. This has been a journey in learning more about myself as I learn how to read my children; learning how to accept change. I honestly delight in who they are at every stage of their lives. Life equals change. Change equals growth. Growth equals pain. I'm so thankful we get to do this life together.

These kids have taught me how to be a mom. It is an ever-changing, on-going process. I will never arrive. I will (hopefully) continue to grow and change as they do so I can be what they need when they need it. I never set out to be the perfect mom or to raise perfect kids. We are all acutely aware of our faults, challenges, insufficiencies, quirks, and imperfections. Those very things are what endear us to each other. 

I can only imagine what life will look like ten years from now. One thing I do know....it will be different, but it will be beautiful because life is good. As Henry Miller says, "The aim of life is to live, and to live means to be aware, joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware."

May I live everyday aware of the gifts these people in my life bring me. If I do that, I won't focus on the inconveniences, the frustrations, the irritations, the exhaustion, and the disappointment that parenthood inevitably brings. I will choose to focus on the good because good is plentiful, plentiful is abundance,  abundance is love, and love wins. Always.

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