Sticky Note Affirmations

 

 This is Chloe's bathroom. We like to leave love notes for each other.

 

This is the door to her bathroom.

 

This is my side of the sink. I feel overwhelmed with gratitude by all the love coming off those sticky notes from all my people.

 

This is Chuck's side of the sink. At first glance, one might see an inequity of sticky notes. But, how many dads have their very own poster board of their perfect likeness smothered in affirming sticky notes taped to the bathroom door? That's what I thought. So maybe the inequity isn't as drastic as it appears. I wouldn't feel too sorry for him. He's feeling the love. Afterall, just look at that smile.

 

One thing I know for sure, I treasure these little pieces of paper more than any one knows. Affirmations go a long way!

 

Work Fam

Why am I so lucky?! I have THE BEST work family. Everyone is so supportive of each other and genuinely cares. When I was looking for a new job last year, I didn't anticipate also getting a family. What a beautiful bonus! It's taken me a long time to learn the business (medicare) and I ask at least a million questions a day, but they are each so patient with me. They are always teaching and I am always learning. The least I can do to show my thanks is feed them.

 

 

 

So, this weekend they came to my house to play with my family and me and they fit right in. We ate awesome tacos, drank delicious mocktails, and played ping pong, spike ball, corn hole, and Taboo.

Families that play together, stay together. I love us!

Captain Fitness

 

Look at this sweet girl being all muscular and stuff. She honestly has gotten very strong while working at The Little Gym. Not only from having to constantly pick up young children, but also from all the cleaning and moving of heavy mats and equipment she also does as part of her job. 

But that's not what this story is about. Each week, the gym's classes are centered around a theme...exercise, castles., food. Stuff like that. One of those weeks, Chloe was tagged by her bosses as "Captain Fitness." And because these are such young little ones, they still blur the line between reality and fantasy most of the time. They called her Captain Fitness the rest of the day. She reveled in her new found heroism.

The Homeless Hotel

This was supposed to be a fun brother/sister trip to Tempe, AZ to check out ASU together. Although Chloe and I had already been, Bennett wanted to see the area and Chloe wanted to go with him. But as you can tell from the title, it devolved into something else entirely. So this is the text we get from Bennett after they checked into the hotel:

Since the kids aren't old enough to rent a car, they were dependent on the hotel shuttle to pick them up from the airport. I spent LOTS of time picking out just the right hotel. It had to be close to campus, close to the airport, offer a shuttle, have free breakfast, a great pool, a fitness center, and allow a 19 year old to reserve a room. Quite a lot of parameters, but I've never met a challenge I can't meet (okay, tbh, I've met quite a few...but none that involve researching and finding the perfect hotel for the amount I'm willing to spend). Ergo...because I spent so much time looking for just the right place, I was devastated to learn that it was so awful. The website mentioned some renovations, but nothing about no amenities whatsoever. 🤦 Then later that evening, Chloe texts us this message:

 

 

OMG! Stick a dagger in my heart already! I feel just awful! Aren't parents supposed to protect their young?! What have we done?! You can take us out of the running for the Parent of Year Award now. One more interesting twist...Do you see that fire truck on the far left in the first picture? Yes, the fire alarm went off while they were there and they had to go outside, through the homeless stairwell and wait with all the homeless people for the firetruck to come check the building and allow them back in. At this point, I just wanted to yell at somebody. MY BABIES are stuck in a homeless hotel and I put them there unknowingly! Arghhh!! Talk about feeling helpless. In my wisdom, and as penance, I stayed up all night worrying. I left the ringer on my phone and told the kids to call or text me any time of the night. My stomach churned and my mind came up with all the worst case scenarios it could think of. Typical Mom stuff. I thought about practicing my breathing techniques I learned to calm down and lower my racing heart - but my lungs were having none of it. I then tried praying, but that brought no solace either. 

 

I love that the lesson Chloe saw in all of this was resilience. YES! Yes, Chloe...that's what I was hoping you would learn but was certainly not manipulating the circumstances to create this opportunity. But my heart is tickled that she saw it this way. She knew that she had a choice and they both chose to see the humor, the deeper character lesson, and make the most of their time together.

This is the "pretty at night" picture Chloe was talking about. The reason there are almost no day pictures is because of the other fact that made this trip insane is that it was 118 degrees both days they were there. That made being outside in the day close to impossible. And remember, they had to walk everywhere because they didn't have a car. There is no pool to cool off in. And the cold water didn't work in their shower.I mean, it totally looks like we sent them off to Phoenix and set this whole thing up so they wouldn't ever want to go back. We couldn't have planned this if we tried. It's so unbelievable, it's funny! Now they have a crazy story to share that will become mythical by the time they have kids of their own looking at colleges.

 

Chloe's Turn

This is the dream. If she can achieve it, she will be one happy camper!

 

Palm trees and sun. Check.

An inclusive motto and self-contained, beautiful campus. Check.

 Applying with her best friend. Check.

Awesome dorms! Check.

 

Plenty of bathroom space in said dorms. Check.

A best friend to share all the excitement, dreams, and time with. Check.

 

 

Since our visit to the ASU West Campus was the day after school got out, I thought it would be fun to stay at a nice hotel with an incredible pool so the three of us could relax in in the sun and melt out school year cares away.

I ended up finding the most awesome hotel with not just one pool, but 8! We spent alot of time soaking up our much beloved sun under our much beloved palm trees.

The best college visit I've ever been on - that's for sure!

Just because I love my sweet girl.

Forever Friends

What a perfect way to start summer...with your oldest and dearest friends! And the best part is, the boys planned all of this all on their own. All I had to do was provide the food, bed, and car. Sweet deal! 

These boys have been friends since elementary school. Gavin and Pranav met in 5th grade and Bennett and Vik met in 2nd grade. They've stayed close even after we moved to two different states and they each went off to different colleges. Every time they meet up, they pick up right where they left off. 

Pranav started his visit with Gavin in North Dakota and then they flew to Colorado to spend the rest of the week adventuring around here. Vik flew straight into Colorado and hit the ground running. 

 

 

They experienced the bike pump track.

It looks easy until you try it.

They played at least 10 games of Marvel Villainous. And chess.

They climbed Horsetooth Mountain together. Speaking of mountains, Gavin and Pranav had their hearts set on climbing a 14er this time. They read up on it and tried to prepare the best they could. They even set off at 3:30 in the morning in order to drive the 2.5 hours it takes to get there so they can start early in the morning as is advised. However, the first mountain they tried to get to, Mt. Bierstadt, was closed. The road up there was blocked due to snow. So they googled the next closest 14er and drove to it. Gavin said the road was so bad they had to park 2 miles down the mountain because it was solid ice on the road up to the parking area. He said it got half way up and had to drive in reverse back down again. In the dark. At 5:30 in the morning. They got there the same time as a couple other people. He said they all hiked together and got about a 1/3 of the way up before they were forced to quit. Why were they forced to quit, you ask? Because the wind was about to blow them off the mountain and they were hiking in thigh-deep snow. Gavin's glasses were ripped right off his face and whipped down the mountain. Nature can be brutal.

Of course there was LOTS of spikeball!

As well as bouldering. There were many things I didn't get photos of such as our dinners and sitting around talking. Gavin and Pranav riding the pump track. All the games of raquetball they played. The many ice cream runs we made because...summer. The multiple trips to the store they took for me to replenish the vasts amounts of food necessary to feed 4 active young adult men.

It's such a joy to watch these beautiful friendships grow and deepen over the years. They each value what the other values. Many interests they share, many they don't but they make a point to show interest in what each other likes. That right there is the definition of friendship!

Becoming

       Photo by Jack Ray on Unsplash

Almost

Not Quite

Not Yet

 

Becoming

 

In Process

 Progressing 

Transforming

Becoming

All that was

All that is

All that will be

Becoming

Mindful

Curious

Conscious

Becoming

Listen

Watch

Wait

Becoming

It all belongs

Let it be your guide

Everything is your teacher

Becoming

Turn toward the light

Let the rain nourish you

Growth is happening

Becoming

Unseen

Underground

Unspoken

Becoming

Cyclical

Rebirth

Awakening

Becoming

 

Mother's Day

 

What a wonderful day it was! Even though I always ask that it be no big deal, Chuck and the kids always make it just perfect. This one was no exception. We headed down to Denver to eat at our favorite sushi joint - Hapa Sushi. Always a delicious treat! I only like to eat out at places where I can't replicate the food at home. And I definitely cannot replicate any of these incredible items.

These are called: Magic Mushrooms. They are neither mushrooms or sushi. They are a piece of cooked salmon wrapped around a piece of avocado, topped with a Japanese spicy aoli. Mmmm! My mouth is watering just writing about it! Thankfully, Bennett drove up from The Springs to join us for the special occasion and his first Hapa experience!

This gorgeous store happened to be across the street from our restaurant. I had heard alot about it and always wanted to go and since it was Mother's Day, no one could say "no" to me. It was everything it was hyped up to me and more!

Every space was meticulously decorated. The architecture of the building only added to it's grandeur.  We had a blast walking through the 4 story store picking out our favorite things in each vignette. 

 

 

We sat on exceptionally large sofas.

We sat in gorgeous mock bathrooms.

We pined for things we couldn't have, but wanted none-the-less.

And we saw great art! Always a bonus in my book.

And the icing on the cake was this GORGEOUS rain coat Chuck and Chloe bought for me. It is truly a luxury (a soft, comfortable, name-brand one) that I will cherish for years to come! Believe it or not, it had either been raining or snowing so much this spring that a raincoat is was actually a very appropriate gift this season. 

I typically despise this obligatory holiday marked on our calendars only because of Hallmark sentimentality. I cherish my kids beyond words and I know they love me - they show it every day in every way. I don't need a day to make it official. But I do so appreciate all the effort and care my sweet family puts into making it a special day out of the abundance of love in their collective hearts.

Spring Break In Miami

 

This is what Spring Break at 16 looks like when you and your best friend proposed, planned, saved, and waited for two whole months. 

Back on January 2nd, the girls, feeling they had SAD put together an adorable powerpoint presentation proposing a spring break trip to Miami to help them deal with their disorder. 

They proposed saving for, planning, spending all their own money, as well as following stringent COVID safety protocol. Plus, they wouldn't be going solo, they'd be with Maggie's Mom and sister.

We agreed to said proposal on one condition....grades must be at a certain level. If that could be maintained, then Miami - here they come!

It was very dicey on the grade front...even after Chloe purchased her ticket. But she pulled through in the 11th hour and managed to find herself sitting on the plane next to Maggie.

 

 

I was promised sunrise pictures, but to no avail. There would be no one awake at sunrise! Ever!

Look at that white sand beach! And those tomato red feet! Although they put sunscreen on the first hour of the first day, they forgot to ever reapply. They paid a very steep price for that little oversight. As did we. We heard about how itchy and painful the whole episode of molting was for an entire two weeks following the World's Worst Sunburn Ever!

But the whole vacation did serve to fill up Chloe's soul. We all need time in nature soaking up the sun, waves, beauty, and fresh air! And all the better when we get to spend it with our favorite person! We are thrilled the girls were able to achieve their goal...it's that much sweeter after working so hard!

 

Celebrating Seventeen

What a difference a year makes! Last year we couldn't wait to surprise Chloe with her car. It was the one thing we looked forward to all quarantine. This year, life is filled with much more hope, expectation, and fun. We haven't gotten our vaccine yet, but it's just around the corner. We've lived safely with masks, social distancing, and an abundance of caution for over a year now. And just like that my baby turned 17. It doesn't seem possible...it feels like we somehow lost a year.

I usually get all reminiscent and melancholy on the kids birthdays because: time. I feel like my life is being played out at 1.5x or 2x speed. It's literally flying! And because I've been through two other kids' 17 year old birthdays, I'm intimately aware of how incredibly fast this last year of Chloe living with us will evaporate. This saddened me beyond words this year. It was a heavy ache in my heart. I already miss Chloe and she hasn't even left yet!

But the sadness coexists with my immense joy for her to begin flying on her own as she leaves the nest. Each of the kids are leaving fully equipped and ready for the world. I share the joy, excitement, and hesitancy. It's all good. It's all normal. We can carry all those emotions at the same time. 

Okay...now for the explanation about the ridiculous brown car cake in the picture above. Chloe requested a race car cake. I tried talking her into a race track cake with little matchbox cars on top of it. Nope. She wanted the cake to be the race car. End of story. No negotiations. So....this is the best I could do. It looks a little more like...I don't know. I've never seen a car, much less a race car, that looks like this. But it did have fancy racing stripes and numbers on each side. And my sweet girl was happy...so that's all that matters.

Speaking of race cars. We also went indoor go-kart speed racing a few days before Chloe's birthday.

Here's our little speed demon coming out of the gate. I think these only went like 35 mph. But when you're that close to the ground and taking hair pin turns, it feels more like 60mph.

Chloe's best friend, Maggie, joined us for the festivities. Maggie beat Chloe twice, btw.

We capped off our fun day of racing with lunch at Chuy's. A nice treat, since eating out is a rarity any more. Plus, we had the added bonus of Bennett coming up from The Springs to join our festivities.

Both of the boys were able to join us via zoom for The Opening Of The Gifts after school. It was as if we were all hanging out in the living room together. We had so much fun. Gavin gave Chloe a pocket knife. Bennett gave her some anklets. We gave her a Lululemon gift card. She was in heaven. What more does a 17 year old need?

On Chloe's actual birthday night, the three of us took a relaxing stroll around Windsor Lake. It was pitch black by time we finished, but the views during the first half of the walk were spectacular. A beautiful end to a very special day!