Today, at the end of another day in a long line of days of Chuck being out of town, the kids and I sat down to play a delightful little game of Yahtzee. I thought that would be a nice little way of doing something together before bed. Even though we've been 'doing something together' all day, that didn't count, it was only school.
Games with the kids really aren't my 'thing'. I can't stand the way my kids sit there clueless each and every time it's their turn to go and they don't know until I nonchalantly yell it at them. Then there's the constant noise level and commotion; movement that I seem to be extra sensitive to after a long day of constant noise and movement all around me.
By this time in the evening I like quiet, peaceful activities...like reading a book maybe. Too bad for me, cuz at this time in the evening for the kids, they prefer such fun activities as wrestling, rolling on the floor, singing at the top of their lungs and playing crazy songs on the piano at the loudest possible level. "Mommy look at this...", "Mommy watch me do this...", "Mommy come here real quick so I can show you something...", "Mommy guess what superhero I am right now. Want to know all my powers?..." bombard me all at the same time.
When Chuck is home, this would be the time of day I typically retreat back to the solitude and quietness of my beloved bath and recharge as he enjoys playing with the kids. But no...there is not meant to be any solitude for me while Chuck is away. And I'm okay with that. I know my weaknesses and have been begging God to for his grace to be sufficient in me daily. I need to just push past this 'sleepy time' in my brain when it would prefer to shut down and focus inward instead of continuing to give to the kids in these sub-optimal conditions (at least for me).
Yahtzee was progressing as all other games normally progress for us. Chloe insisted on rolling for me. Whenever she shook the container holding the dice, she seemed to always shake one out of it and then she had issues getting them all out onto the floor. She preferred to drop all the dice out at about 3 feet off the floor which resulted in us spending a majority of precious time looking for the missing dice. Gavin couldn't make a decision to save his life. He didn't know which one was the right one to make. Cuz afterall, you could possibly make a wrong decision in this game and it ruin the rest of your life. So, he kept asking me what he should do...which play was the right one. Then there was Bennett. He had a blank stare on his face the whole game. Every time he rolled he counted all the numbers on the dice and wanted to write the answer somewhere. Nothing I said to him was registering. Oh ya, and I had a migraine.
So...as you see, conditions were not optimal. I could sense myself getting a little, shall we say...perturbed, irritated, annoyed. I took a deep breath and asked God to please be my patience right now and help me just enjoy this precious time I get to spend with my kids. And guess what...He did. :)
At the exact moment the prayer left my lips. Mr. Clueless Player looks at me with his sweet, little grin and says, "There's something about you Mommy, that other Mommies don't have...". As I'm waiting for the punch line, I just knew it was going to be something like...a lack of patience, the ability to play a game and get irritated or snappy with her kids...or something sarcastic along those lines.
But instead, he tells me something I knew in my heart I didn't deserve, but he showed me grace anyways..."you're the lovingest, kindest, givingest, most appreciative Mommy." Gulp. I didn't deserve such an outpouring of love at this moment...yet that's what he showed me.
After a few more crazy turns with the dice he comes out with another one. "There's something else about you other Mommies don't have...you've got the best husband." His timing is impeccable. We've all missed Daddy and knew that this would normally be something we'd be doing with him if he were home. So, I decided to do what Daddy would do...I showed Bennett love the way he likes to receive it. I reached over, pegged him down and started wrestling with him. I licked him all over his face like a dog, tickled him all over...it was so much fun. And I did it, headache and all, because...His grace is sufficient for me.
