Over-Thinking

As Gavin, Bennett and I were waiting at the Doctor's office yesterday we were making small talk (I've got to practice on someone). I was telling the boys how, many nights, as I lay there falling asleep I'm mentally composing an email I need to write or a blog post. I just can't find the "off" switch. Frustrating, right?! I need to relate to somebody. I asked Gavin, "Does the same thing happen to you?"

"No. I think about Quantum Physics and String Theory." he responds.

"Hmmmmm. Ya, I don't have that problem. Bennett, how about you?" I ask.

"I don't think."

There you have it. Us in a nutshell. The conversation was over and we went back to staring at the wall waiting for our name to be called.

( Huffington Post came out with a hilarious article just today about this very same phenomenon: 8 Illustrations Over-Thinkers Will Relate To On A Deep Level. )

How We Do Valentines

For 6 years now Chuck and Chloe have been enjoying their very special time together each Valentine's Day. The very first event was a Daddy/Daughter Dance when Chloe was 4. She was the Princess going to the ball and Daddy was her Prince Charming. They went to these dances year after year. Chloe adores her Daddy. Now, the dances have been preempted by a Date with Dad. They pick a favorite restaurant (usually something very spicy) and then go somewhere fun. This year they went to Blick, an art supply store, to look at all the cool art stuff and buy a sketch pad. Chloe definitely has her Dad's creative flair and eye for design.

While those two are off galavanting and living the high life of Princeses and Knights in Shining Armor, I have the joy of getting in touch with my more masculine side. These are my people. They tower over me now making me feel like the kid. But, believe it or not, there was once a day when I was taller than them. This rowdy crowed opted for my kind of fun on this eve of Valentine's Day...we hit Half-Price Books and Smash Burger. Then we came back home and watched Dateline NBC. This is how it goes down when you're mature like we are.

But not to fear, we have continued with our beloved, time-honored tradition of Valentine's Date at Home.  You know, the one where Chuck cooks, the kids serve, and we pretend to be out at a fancy restaurant. Over the years we have progressed from sitting at a tiny kids table in the middle of the living room to actually getting to sit at the big people's table. But now "the help" talks to us while we're dining and don't always stay in the kitchen where they belong (but it's kinda hard cuz the table is in the kitchen). Whatever the set-up, it's always a blast and a tradition I'm so thankful we started. Leave it to Chuck to turn something unfortunate (lack of money and no one to watch our kids for a date nite) into something spectacular (a tradition we couldn't imagine living without).

Inspiring Documentary

Normally every Friday night at our house is pizza and movie night. The movie selection this past Friday was a documentary entitled, "Fed Up". So, of course we're sitting in front of the tv shoving our mouths full of pizza while watching a film that documents America's poor eating habits and addiction to sugar. Apropos.

This is one of those things that once you learn, you can't unlearn. Once you know something, you are now responsible for what you're going to do with it. Kind of like what happened when we watched Food, Inc. 

So we had a family talk and all agreed that we should probably better monitor our sugar intake. We did a great job of this years ago. I had the crazy rule (that I borrowed from Michael Pollan) when the kids were younger that we could only eat sugar on a day that started with "s". So, basically on the weekends the kids could indulge in sugar ladened products but would try to make healthier choices during the week with real food. That served us pretty well for many years. But as they got older, our rules got laxer.

The kids took this message to heart. I was surprised by how convicted they felt. We kinda all agreed to go back to our sugar only on the weekends again. I even took them to the store with me the next day (we all know what a feat of heroism that is!) when I did my grocery shopping so they could have a part in making healthy food choices for the week. They paid close attention to the sugar content in packaged foods and tried hard to pick only real foods. We agreed that soda was completely out. I also decided to learn how to cook more tastey vegetable sides. We knew all this change was for the best, even though it would initially be hard.

I absolutely love how the kids had a hand in all this. They are owning their choices, not just doing what we say. We are by no means turing into health food fanatics or growing our own vegetables (I suck at gardening) or going off the deep end with this. We want there to be balance in the whole endeavor. If we go cold turkey - this will never work. But we've decided to be more purposeful in our food choices. But that is very hard when sugar is the driving force behind every single snack food flooding your frontal cortex. We are inundated with sugar. We've become desensitized to it. It's become such the norm that going without it seems somehow 'un-normal'.

One more way the Mallotts like to go against the grain I guess.

First College Visit

I can't believe I'm even writing this post. It sounds surreal coming out of my mouth. But this is our new reality. Gavin and I had his first college tour today. He decided he wanted to check out Carlton College in a town only 30 minutes south of us. We've known about this college for years and have even walked around it's campus before - but only in appreciation of it's beauty.

Obviously I wasn't prepared for the magnitude of this moment because I totally forgot to pose for a picture with Gavin on the actual school grounds. We took this picture once we got home. I know...a total fail. This was my first time; I'll get it right the next time, I promise.

By the end of the Information Session I was sold. Apparently, it doesn't take much to sell me anything. I buy anything that's wrapped in a pretty package. Especially if there is a cool video and music to go with it that might possibly make me emotional.

But, I'm not the one about to spend 4+ years at an institution of higher learning. So...I bit my tongue (often times very hard) and said nothing. I just walked along acting like a cool cucumber (cuz that's what Gavin wanted). My main job was not to embarrass my uber-cool son.

As we got in the car to go home he said, "Well...I wouldn't be disappointed if I went here." That is very positive people. These are happy words. He went on to say that he mostly appreciated the culture of the college. I asked him to share with me his top 3 pros and top 3 cons. Surprisingly, his were the same as the ones I was mentally cataloging. But I didn't want to say anything because I don't want to in any way influence his decision. Imagine that! We both appreciated the same 3 things about the school. I knew we were uni-mind.

This is going to be a super fun journey, I can tell. We have many more places on the list to visit. I'm excited to see the final destination of where this journey ultimately leads.  Exciting times my friends, exciting times.

The Basketball Date

My awesome boy and me on our long awaited Date Nite. What else would the two of us do if it didn't involve basketball? I love basketball as much as Bennett, I just don't play it. Granted, I also don't spend all my free time watching basketball highlights on YouTube like my sweet boy.

On this fabulous night we chose to go see a local favorite team, the Apple Valley Eagles. The town right next to ours is the hometown of the NCAA Champs 2015 star player: Tyus Jones. He went to Apple Valley High School before attending Duke University last year. He was playing varsity ball by 8th grade. He's kind of a local legend.

We watched his team play to victory during last year's March Madness. There was a lot of hype around here since he is local. To top off our wondrous luck, he got drafted this year by the Minnesota Timberwolves (although we've yet to see him play there). And he was at last night's game cheering on his younger brother. That was a bonus for us.

But this was who we went to see last night: Tre Jones. He is definitely following in his older brother's footsteps. It was a thrill to watch him. At only 2 years older than Bennett, he is a starter on the varsity team. His team is ranked number 1 in Class 4A ball in Minnesota. He scored an amazing 35 points against rival, and second-ranked team in our division, Shakopee. 

All I know is that I was standing for the last 10 minutes of the game. The energy in the stadium was palpable. The teams were evenly matched, answering each other's call all night. With less than 15 seconds to go, Apple Valley was down by 2 points. Then Tre drove into the basket making a clutch 2 pointer that would tie his team and bring them into over time. The crowd went wild! Apple Valley kicked it up a notch in overtime and ended up sealing the victory with a 75-65 win. It was beautiful. If my sportscasting skills aren't up to par, you can read all about their sweet victory and all the play by play details here.

Needless to say, it was the perfect night for Bennett and me. 

Adventures with Pericles

For my last birthday Chuck gave me tickets to go see Pericles at the Guthrie. We've become rather fascinated by the theater lately. We were filled with anticipation as the night approached. We had no idea what the performance would be about other than the brief description on the Guthrie website:

Enter Pirates! Set sail with Pericles, Prince of Tyre, on an action-packed, epic journey. In heroic fashion, Pericles woos a princess, fights a famine, weathers storms and a shipwreck, wins the hand of his wife, loses her at sea, and entrusts his only child to a king and queen. From a riddle to a heartrending reunion, Shakespeare’s tale charts one man’s sweeping voyage from a headstrong youth to a sage, world-weary man, with humor, pathos and passion.

Sounds good to us. Little did we know it would not be in English. At least modern day English. This was real, literal Shakespeare people! Not an adaptation. Not a revised version. Not a modern day reenactment. This was the real McCoy. And we were beyond confused.

We sat there befuddled from the very beginning. We each thought the other knew what was happening. I'm afraid this confession shows our level of intellect. Not that we don't enjoy intellectual pursuits - just not on the Shakespearean level. At intermission (Chuck referred to it as 'halftime') we looked at each other and bust out laughing. "Do you have a clue what's happening?" he asks me. I dug deep to come up with an answer that sounded like I appreciate this gift of time at the theater together without telling him I had no clue what it was we were watching, "Well....I think I understand it by context clues. But I don't actually understand any of the words."

We felt like we were sitting at the Big People table when we should have been at the Kids' Table. We were clueless as to the conversation. I once met a family who would all sit around the dinner table reciting Shakespearean quotes to each other and laughing in response to the prose. I felt completely out of my league. My idea of funny dinnertime quotes is Brian Regan. Speaking of which, he has a skit that precisely describes how we felt. Even though it deals with opera, this could also come in handy during an evening out with Shakepeare . I believe our endeavor of trying to be more cultured would have been better accomplished if it followed this ideology:

On Playing Chess

This game. (Imagine me shaking my head side to side with my eyes closed as I say this.)

Gavin is ALL ABOUT this game.

This is his thing. It's filled with logic and strategy and rules. Heaven for Gavin.

Me, not so much.

But I love my boy and I want to take an interest in what he likes. If that means I need to learn how to play chess so we can spend time together, so be it. I am now a chess player.

Apparently all these pieces have names. I was previously only aware of the King, Queen and Pawn. I still am not 100% sure of the others, I like to refer to them as my horse, castle and other thingy. I just learned they each have a point value attached to them. Like I'm not supposed to sacrifice my castle for something with lesser points. This was news to me.

Gavin willingly spends his own money on buying books about chess strategy. He studies the games of Magnus Carlsen and tries to copy his moves. He knows the names of certain starting moves. This is stuff that all blows my mind.

Did you know that serious chess players even write down their moves? I did not. As I said before, I'm new at this whole chess thing. Apparently people are very serious about chess. I can relate because I'm very serious about nertz. So on some level we're the same. I prefer a game that's all about speed, chance and hand/eye coordination. Gavin prefers a game that's slow, logical and methodical. Figures.

If I ask Gavin to teach me as we play, he does. He explains why a move I made was bad or good. He shows me how to make better choices. He helps me think about more than just my next move. Isn't that what parents are supposed to do only in regards to life?

This is a lesson in humility, trust and logic for me. I don't ever want to be too old to learn something new...especially if my son is teaching it to me. I may never win, but life isn't about winning, it's about growing. Chess is growing me closer to my son and deepening my appreciation for people who understand and play this game on a regular basis. Man, they're smart!

Fun In The Sun

We had three unexpected treats today: sun, skating and a shake.

The kids had the day off school. We probably could have wiled away the day laying next to the fireplace reading our individual stacks of books and playing chess. And that would have been fun and relaxing for each of us. But then I remembered that it's the annual St. Paul Winter Carnival. And how fun would it be to spend our free day together walking around outside on a cold, gray, windy day looking at ice sculptures?!

Everyone bought what I was selling and we jumped in the car and headed up there. And what do you know, on our way the sun broke through the clouds and shone from the heavens. That's when I knew that this was going to be a glorious day! Suddenly the cold didn't matter. The wind disappeared and all was right in the world again. The sun came out.

We admired several of the ice sculptures and then headed over to the out-door skating rink. It's always fun watching your kids fall down repeatedly for no reason at all. Especially Bennett. He was never in an upright position (except in this photo and that's only because he's clinging to me). Chloe's hand was glued to the little side wall which helped her navigate the skating oval. Gavin was too cool to fall down. And I was brazen enough to bring my camera out on the ice. I find ice skating infinitely easier than snow skiing. I just get bored of going in circles. I wish there was some type of ice maze or track you were supposed to follow to go somewhere other than the repetitive, never-ending oval. But it was fun none-the-less.

You can't just stop having fun so abruptly. So we capped off our little outing with some delish milkshakes courtesy of Smashburger. Yes, that was lunch and I am okay with that. Because we are having fun, right? And fun doesn't have to always be healthy. Right? And because the sun is out. And I desperately want to be the  'cool', 'fun' mom, even if I have to sacrifice my healthy food choices to attain that status level with my kids. #Relevant

The Big Game

See number 50 shooting the free throw? That's my boy! He was on fire this game. The whole team was. What a difference it makes when the 5 guys out on the court are playing like a team. They can move mountains! And they did. The gray and red team they are playing against is Lakeville North. Our long time rival. We have never beat them in 5 years of playing against them. But not this night. This night we went out there and whooped up on them to the shock of everyone.

The game was ours right from the start.  Number 4 - Nathan, swished 3 3-pointers to put us on top within the first two minutes. That boosted our teams' moral big-time. Suddenly, we remembered everything we've ever learned these past five years of playing ball. We passed like pros. We rebounded. We stole the ball. We made every fast-break we took. We followed actual plays. It was a dream come true. Not only for Bennett and his team but for those of us who have spent countless hours in the stands cheering them on year after year. We couldn't contain our excitement.

Bennett ended up with 23 points, 3 rebounds, 2 steals and 1 assist. His best game to date. The team was unstoppable this one game on this one night. We won the game 62-51. The highlights never made it to ESPN. No one else will probably ever hear of this single win in an otherwise less than stelar season to an average 8th grade boys B team. But we will never forget it. It's the memory that will propel them forward when they need to draw on something from the past in situations that require the "I think can, I think can, I think can..." mentality. We couldn't have been prouder. Who needs a superbowl ring or an NCAA Championship title or Nike endorsement? We have the David vs. Goliath win over Lakeville North. That's all we need.

Surprised at Seventeen

Shockingly, we were able to pull off a surprise party for Gavin for this, his 17th year. It was awesome. It was everything I was hoping it would be. He was truly shocked. Without ever meeting any of his friends before (except one) I was able to successfully get a bunch of them here. I sneakily asked Gavin to give me the phone numbers of his co-captains in Mock Trial just in case I ever needed to reach him in case of an "emergency" - he willingly obliged. They in turn spread the word to the rest of the team. Within one week we had 12 people rounded up and here on time. Unfortunately, I had to leave all the decorating to the two crazy kids behind Gavin because I only had an hour to make all the finger foods to feed everyone. But that made it all the more special for him. He turned as red as a tomato but stayed as cool as a cucumber. His response upon walking into his surprise was, "Hmmm, that's interesting." He was a gracious host. We had a blast playing games all night with these sweet people.

On his actual birthday we celebrated by going out with Grandma and Grandpa to the restaurant of his choice - Osaka Hibachi Grill. It was nummy! Excellent choice Gavin. We came home and again played more games and ate even more cake. Good times were had by all.

At the beginning of our parenthood journey back in 2000.

And now only one year left with this sweet, awesome kid still living with us at home. 

What an amazing ride we've had! 

Bath Time

In this house, we all prefer to bathe at night. It's just the thing we do. And since I still don't have a functional shower in my bathroom, I have to (I know, it's a hard life) take a bath in my beautiful, wonderful tub. Not that I'm complaining, I love me a good bath. But what I don't like is stealing all the hot water so the rest of my beloved clan get to bathe in only mildly luke-warm water or out-right cold water after me. Not cool. I try to let the kiddos get their showers in before I fill my tub.

But on this particular evening, as we got home a tad bit late, and definitely after my usual bath-time (which I won't share cuz it will just prove how pathetic I really am), I sighed and told the kids, "Well, I guess you should all get your showers in. I'll wait." The boys would have none of that. I'm not sure if it was because they don't care about personal cleanliness as much as their mother or if it was borne out of deep concern for their mother's mental stability and well-being, but they both reached for me at the same time and scooped me up to bring me upstairs so that I could be the first to take my bath.

They are so strong and big now. Chuck snapped this picture quickly on his phone as proof. My two knights in shining armor deposited me in my bedroom (without tripping, bumping into the wall or hurting themselves or me) and gallantly said they would wait to start their respective showers until they heard my water stop.

What sacrifice. What adoration. What a great excuse to stay up longer with Daddy and maybe forget to bathe and get to procrastinate the whole hygiene ritual just a little bit longer.

This is love people. They are speaking my language. I'm an early to bed, early to rise kind of person. My nightly bath calms me (plus the added bonus of getting clean is nice). My voice starts to crack, my eyes get droopy, my words cease to make sense, I get a far-a-way look in my eyes - they all know the signs. Mom is about to crash and needs her bath. And they rose to the occasion and showered me with love.

After my bath they tucked me in as is our new nightly ritual. Yes. I go to bed before most of my children. Life is full of surprises.  I never saw that one coming.

Skiing - Mallott Style

For Christmas this year we gave the kids a ski trip. We tend to value adventures and time together over things/toys. The kids have known about this for a long time. Part of the fun is the anticipation. We left the day after Christmas - IN A SNOW STORM - and attempted to ski for 2 full days having never all actually skied together, ever. Chuck ranked the highest in our 'experience' scale being that he skied twice as a teenager in Ohio as well as a failed attempt at snowboarding with me a few years ago. Bennett went skiing once with a friend a year ago. Chloe had a ski lesson last year during a field trip. My attempt at snowboarding once was disastrous. And Gavin has never touched skis before in his life. We knew something good had to come from all this. And no, we were not about to pay for ski lessons, that would just be a waste of time (according to Chuck). Thus begins our adventure:

The lovely drive north.

After eating lunch in Grand Marais, we headed off in search of the famed Gunflint Trail. We had no idea it was also a part of the Boundary Waters. It's a beautiful 58 mile road with lots of gorgeous vistas, hiking and trekking to be had. On this fine day we were headed straight for the Moose Viewing Trail. 

As with most of our hikes, we came completely unprepared. Not one person carried a whistle in case of an emergency, or water or granola bars in case we got stranded and had to wait for a search and rescue team. Heck, we didn't even have our snow pants on and the snow was over a foot deep - up to our knees. Plus, we were the only car parked in the space we assumed was a parking lot. The snow covered any trial and signage. We walked a half mile the wrong way (we were following moose tracks such as the one Chloe's boot is next too). 

Once we got back to where we started, we saw a sign pointing in the opposite direction from where we previously "hiked".  It was so quiet and serene. We felt like we were in the woods in the Chronicles of Narnia after they walked through the wardrobe into perpetual winter.

This is the direction we were supposed to go to the Moose Viewing Trail. Unfortunately, the fallen trees were no obstacle for us. We traversed under and over in search of a moose. I was both super excited and very afraid. What if we actually saw a moose in our path?!? We didn't have a plan other than to snap a picture of it and run. I was a little relieved that we didn't see one but also very disappointed because, how cool would that have been?! We then trudged back through the snow with sopping wet jeans and boots filled with snow in search of the cabin we would be spending the next three days in.

Here was our glorious cabin. We now feel very Minnesotan. Every Minnesotan has said at one time or another that they "went up north" to spend time "at the cabin". Now we can join in that chorus.

Many a chess game was played. The night comes fast and it is so dark and quiet. We were off the grid with zero cell coverage and no internet. I felt very rustic and Little House on the Prairie-ish.

Here is Gavin cooking some brownies for everyone after a rough day of skiing.

Here we are playing a game of Scrabble at the table.

This is the guest cabin about 50 yards away from the main house. This is where Chuck and I stayed since there were only two bedrooms in the main cabin. Very cozy.

The gorgeous sunset on Pike Lake at our cabin.

We spent two hours in this little room on our very first day of skiing. We had zero clue how long it would take to get all our gear, then get it on, then try to walk with all our stuff over to the bunny slope. Except when we were here, so were like 100 other people, so it made figuring out how to put the most uncomfortable boots in the world on that much more fun. We might have gotten a little flustered.

This was the bunny slope where we all 'cut our teeth'. It was actually called "Flapjack". It was so flat. But that didn't stop us from falling all over ourselves. Chloe, Gavin and I spent the entire first day right here. I felt accomplished just figuring out how to get on the moving sidewalk without falling. Learning how to stop and steer was imperative. Since we had no instructor, trial and error were our guides. Oh ya, and the temperature on this fine day was 10 degrees but with the windchill it was registering at -2. There aren't enough feet and hand warmers in the world to keep you warm enough out here all day in these temperatures. I know.

We took the gondola to the top of the highest peak. This was a great resort. They had 95 runs - 20 of which were for beginners. We only tried out two or three runs - by "we" I mean everyone but me. See that little hill on the left, we never it made it off that "mountain". It felt like Everest when you're going down it on skis, let me tell you! We each had major wipe-outs on the different runs. After I mastered Flapjack, I moved up to Big Bunny. Don't let the name fool you, it was steep! I wiped out big time and really wanted to cry. I barely held it together. I went down it again just to prove that I wouldn't let the mountain beat me - and it didn't! Chloe wiped out huge on another slope and Daddy had to go rescue her (she was more embarrassed that I captured that on video than the actual fall). Chuck and Bennett wiped out three times on a slope they didn't mean to go on and found out it was in the 'more difficult' category. No wonder. It took Gavin a while to master getting off the ski lift standing up. He had quite an interesting dismount that involved falling over every time.

These were the views from the top of the highest peak. That's Lake Superior in the background.

It was sooooooo cold! We did what we could to stay warm. On the second day, the temps reached 15 degrees, but it was very windy thus causing it to feel more like 3. Here we were on the ski-lift. You would think I would have had a cow on the ski-lift but I wasn't scared one bit. What I had a cow about was going down hills really fast on slippery, skinny, shiny skis. I don't like fast. 

Here we were in the Chalet taking a lunch break and trying to warm up before heading back outside to torture ourselves for the next 3 hours. The saddest part of this whole trip was that Chuck was sick the entire time. He felt bad starting Christmas Eve but just thought it was a cold. He had a fever, achy muscles, headache, cough - everything. Come to find out once we got home he had Pertussis. But he skied like a champ. I actually think the skiing invigorated him.

I think we all got the 'ski bug'. However, we might like to try it in some warmer temps next time. And could somebody please work on making those horrible ski boots more comfortable?! For the love!